REFORM WALL STREET? (good luck!)

     First off, let me confess that I work at certain Securities firm here in the STL that shall remain nameless (i don't wanna get fired.  I also can't post pictures of myself in uniform on social web sites. (huh?) Anyway, back to the subject of Wall Street. 
     CROOKS!!!
Sorry, that slipped.  Not all bankers, securities traders, stock brokers...
     THUGS IN BROOKS BROTHERS SUITS!!!
Damn, I gotta get that twitch under control.  Where I work, from the CEO on down are fine people performing a much-needed service to provide for the financial futures of their clients.
     BULLSHIT!  THEY GET A FAT COMMISSION AND BONUS EVEN IF THEY FUCK ALL YOUR MONEY UP!
     I apologize again, folks.  I didn't really mean to say such crude things about the financial geniuses in the industry. (read the book "Too Big to Fail" if not, HBO is making a movie adapted from the book.) There is nothing wrong with entrusting these financial wizards with your retirement, life savings, toenail clippings, etc. You can always be sure that you broker is doin everything he or she can to make sure that your money, retirement fund, earwax, etc. is being invested wisely with every action on their part focused on not giving a shit about your retirement or any other silly-ass concern you have.   Their motto is "so what if I fuck-up your life financially and you spend your retirement years living in an appliance carton under the 40/270 overpass and eating out of dumpsters for dinner, don't bitch at me, you ain't the only muthafucka who's life I've fucked-up. So fire me, I'll just collect my million dollar bonus for fucking-up everybody's money in the securities market and retire to my McMansion in South Beach, Florida".
     So here's a financial tip for Old Black Guy Steve: 
     First take all of your money out of the Bank.(they don't need it, they've got us taxpayers to support them!)
     Second, take all the cash you've got stuffed under your mattress.  You know what I'm talking about, the money you've been making selling your Viagra pills to all the limp-dick drunks at the corner bar you frequent.
     Third, while your wife isn't looking (like when she watchesThe Young and the Restless(useless).  We could have a 10 point on the richter scale earthquake and she wouldn't notice, she's too busy worrying about when will Victor Newman finally grow a pair of nutts and shoot Jack Abbott in the head several times.) Anyway, while she isn't looking, take all of the cash out of her purse (buried under the condoms and k-y gel you're not supposed to know about). that she's earned blowing the limp-dick drunks down at the corner bar after they've eaten your viagra pills(you're not supposed to know about that, she always tells you she had a good nite at bingo.)
     Fourth, take all that money and go to the nearest gambling boat (I prefer Lumiere or Harrah"s). Trust me, the odds for your retirement are a lot better, plus the waitresses look really HOTT in those little skirts and plunging necklines, you won't get that at Edward Jones!

DEAR ED MARTIN,

     Aren't you running a little late for your next Tea Party circle-jerk?  Yet you find time to bash the President and his Homeland Security head honcho because of the "underwear bomber".  U forget to mention that the drawls bomber was inadequately searched in Europe (London to be precise). What the hell could the Prez have done about that, beside calling up Prime Minister Brown and informing him his peeps fucked-up again?
     Oh, I forgot, everything that goes wrong is Obama's fault.  When you wake up in the morning and stub your toe on the bedpost, you yell, "Shit, that goddamn Obama!" Gee, where were u a few years ago? Ooops, forgot, you're a Republican and republicans can do no wrong.  Sorry, I forgot.  My memory's been getting bad lately, must be that fuckin Obama's fault.  But I digress...
P.S.  You limp-dick Tea Party fucks couldn't even stop proposition A from passing.  What fuckin good are you pissed-off neanderthals anyway?  But I digress...

THIS ONE IS TOO EASY!

     Hey, guess what!?  This will shock you, so I hope you are sitting down!  A former East St. Louis councilman has been indicted on charges of tax evasion, voter fraud.  Sorry, folks, this one is just TOO easy, so I'll leave this one alone.

My first Jackass award goes to.....(drum roll, pleeze)

     FRANCHESTA BROWN!!!
Yes, Ms. Brown is the first recipient of the JACKASS AWARD.****
     In the sleepy little hamlet of East St. Louis, native St. Louisan Franchesta Brown was charged with armed robbery.  According to the Evening Whirl (all the news that's fit to print!) Ms. Brown attempted to rob a woman of money and cigarettes (cigarettes?) at a Metro East Metrolink station.
     Unfortunately for Ms. Brown, the victim decided "fuck this stupid bitch, I work too hard for my money and cigarettes, this bitch needs to get a job!" and proceeded to dump the entire contents of her hot cup of java and the amateur robber. The victim made the dash afterwards and flagged down some St. Clair County cops, who arrested the erstwhile Ms. Brown.  While wearing the chrome wrist jewelry, Ms. Brown had the nerve to complain that she was "injured".  Cops called paramedics, but when they arrived, Ms. Brown put up such a struggle and fuss with them, the paramedics said, "fuck it, the only thing wrong with this bitch is she's a JACKASS"! The paramedics left to assist citizens who really need assistance.
     So the moral of this story is, if you're gonna rob somebody with a cup of hot java, wear the appropriate protective gear (face shield, heat-resistant clothing).

Blogger Buzz: Blogger integrates with Amazon Associates

Blogger Buzz: Blogger integrates with Amazon Associates

BOY, IT'S GETTING KINDA ANGRY OUT THERE!

     Finally, health care reform has been passed.  Watered-down as it was, it seems to brought out the worst of a certain segment of our society.  The Tea Party movement came out in force after passage and signing of the bill.  Unfortunately, they came out behaving like pouting, angry children.  I'm sure this will play out as a great recruiting tool for the party of  "no" (republicans) and the party of "we're white, pissed-off and what ya gonna do about it!"

     Now don't get this old black guy wrong, it so happens I agree with many of the Tea Party complaints.  What I tend to question is the timing.  As I've asked before, where were these people for the past nine years when Bush basically mortgaged the country to China to pay for a war he lied to all of us to get into.  And another war based on some frivolous pipe dream of wiping out an ideology (never been done, never will be done)  The two wars combined have set the USA back close to 3 trillion dollars.

     The hot minute a black man is elected President and runs up a trillion dollar deficit to fix some of the problems Bush deemed not important (as long as the military-industrial complex and the oil companies were happily pulling in the no-bid contract bucks).  Somebody comes along to try to help the average main-street Joe and Joan and the average main street Joe and Joan get pissed-off and morph into neanderthals.

     Fear is a powerful force.  The republicans have been using fear to control the non-thinking masses for decades.  The used fear to try to stop the Civil Rights Act (would you want your daughter sitting next to niggers at the Woolworth counter?)  Social Security and Medicare are going to bankrupt the country, even though they turned out to be successful life-lines for millions of older Americans.  They have to take away some of our rights because the Islamic Terrorists are going to get us if we don't! (even though the Mexico border is still wide open and any terrorist simply need to hop across the "fence" and enter the country.  As long as poor Mexicans can sneak in and work for slave wages for greedy businesses, it's okay.)

     Now it's fear that Obama and the Democrats are taking our rights and our country away from us.  Too late for that, Bush already handed our economy over to China years ago because God told him to invade and occupy Iraq.  Bush, Cheney and Rumsfeld, what the hell are 3 draft dodgers doing starting wars, anyway!!

     Anyway, I've figured out how to make the Tea Party people happy and bring peace once again to the political process.  Give them white folks some jobs!  White folks cannot handle hard times.  They can't deal with unemployment and being broke.  Their self-esteem plummets and they think everybody is getting a better break than they are.  Whites have always been about money, money, money.  Their self-esteem is tied to how much money they have. That's why they mortgaged themselves to the eyeballs, using their homes as atm machines, just to show everybody how much money they got by using credit to buy shit they didn't need (swipe that plastic, baby! I'm living large like Trump!)

     And when the inevitable pink slip arrives because the banks played roullette with opm (other people's money) they get panicked, stressed, hateful, bigoted...basically a bunch of spoiled brats on steroids.  When you pick Sarah Palin as one of your spokespeople, that shows true desperation.  That moron couldn't even find Iraq on a map (too busy watching Russia from her backyard, I suppose).

     I know this sounds strange from an old black guy, but I'm enjoying every minute of this stuff.  I do derive a certain sick pleasure watching whites spazz-out over shit black folks have been dealing with all along.  Simply, black folks are used to hard times. No matter how good the economy, we always had hard times.  You don't see us spitting on congressmen and insulting disabled people about it.  And the coffin thing, what was that all about.  That Hennessy guy really needs a real job (obviously too much time on his hands) 


     But, mark my words, as this movement grows, unchecked by so-called leadership, they're going to spit on the wrong congressman, hassle the wrong disabled person, and the silent, optimistic and hopeful majority is going to start fighting back.  Childish behavior gets old after a while.  I think it's time for black folks to start thinking about the possibility of having to go toe-to-toe with these assholes.  Simply put, we'd win.  Black folks have 4 centuries of anger under their belts.  That trumps a couple of years of silly anger, any day.  Black anger is real and not a genie you'd want to let out of the bottle.  


     Lastly, why is Ed Martin's column in the Evening Whirl, of all places?  This guy is a Tea Party shill.  He had the audacity to site the misbehaving Tea Partiers as "scum".  Well, guess what, Ed.  They're your "scum" and what does that make you?  When blacks rose up and protested, we were peaceful, but then, we had a REAL leader.  The Rev. Martin Luther King Jr. would never have tolerated such crude and pathetic behavior.  So here's a little advice for Ed and his cronies from the good Dr. King himself...


               Before a protest can be approved by a responsible leadership, they must  answer the following questions.
1.  Do we have a just grievance, or is our purpose merely to create confusion for it's own sake, as a form of revenge?
2.  Have we first used every form of normal means to eliminate the problem through negotiation, petition and appropriate appeal to authorities?
3.  Having found these channels useless or forcibly closed to us, when we embark upon any kind of lawbreaking, are we prepared to accept the consequences that society will inflict, and maintain, even under punishment, a sense of DIGNITY?
4.  Do we have a CLEAR program to relieve injustice, that does not INFLICT INJUSTICE ON OTHERS, and is that program reasonable and grounded in ETHICS and the BEST TRADITIONS OF SOCIETY?

a few good points for Ed and Dana to follow.  Unfortunately, they won't.